Kumvetsetsa Chisoni Musanafike Kumwalira ndi Imfa
Chisoni chodzidzimutsa ndizowawa zomwe zimachitika pakati pa anthu omwe akukumana ndi imfa ya wokondedwa. Komabe, ngakhale kuti anthu ambiri amadziŵa bwino chisoni chimene chimachitika pambuyo pa imfa (chisoni chenicheni), chisoni chotere chimene chimachitika imfa isanakambidwe mobwerezabwereza. Chifukwa cha ichi, anthu ena amaona kuti sichivomerezeka kukhala ndi anthu kuti afotokoze chisoni chomwe akukumana nacho ndi kulandira chithandizo chomwe akusowa.
Kodi ndikumva chisoni kotani, ndi zizindikiro ziti zomwe mungayembekezere, ndipo mungatani kuti muthane ndi nthawi yovutayi?
Monga mwatsatanetsatane, nkhaniyi ikufotokozedwa kwambiri kwa munthu amene akumva chisoni chakumwalira kwa wokondedwa wake, koma chisoni chokonzekera chikuchitikanso ndi munthu amene akufa. Tikukhulupirira kuti nkhaniyi yokhudzana ndi chisoni choyembekezereka, idzawathandiza onse omwe akufa komanso omwe akulira imfa ya wokondedwa.
Kodi Chisoni Ndi Chiyani?
Chisoni chimafotokozedwa monga chisoni chimene chimapangitsa munthu asanamwalire (kapena kutayika kwakukulu) kusiyana ndi chisoni pambuyo pa imfa (chisoni chenicheni). M'malo mofa kokha, chisoni choterechi chimaphatikizapo zambiri, monga imfa ya mnzanu, kusintha maudindo m'banja, mantha a kusintha kwachuma, ndi kutha kwa maloto a zomwe zingakhale. Chisoni sichichitika pokhapokha, ndipo nthawi zambiri chisoni chimatha kukumbukira zochitika zina zachisoni m'mbuyomo.
Chisoni choyembekezereka chingakhale chofanana ndi chisoni pambuyo pa imfa koma chili chapadera m'njira zambiri. Chisoni chakufa nthawi zambiri chimaphatikizapo kupsa mtima kochulukirapo, kutaya mtima kwambiri, komanso kuyankha mwachidwi. Izi zikhoza kukhala zokhudzana ndi malo ovuta - "pakati pa malo" anthu amapezeka pamene wokondedwa amwalira.
Mayi wina adanena kuti adamva kuti ali ndi maganizo osiyana kwambiri chifukwa adamva kuti akulephera kuyesa kupeza chiyanjano chabwino pakati pa kugwiritsitsa chiyembekezo ndikusiya kupita.
Sikuti aliyense amakumana ndi chisoni chachikulu, ndipo si zabwino kapena zoipa kuchita zimenezo. Anthu ena amakumana ndi chisoni chachikulu pamene wokondedwa wawo amwalira, ndipo kwenikweni, amapeza kuti salola kudzimva chisoni chifukwa zingatanthauzidwe ngati kutaya chiyembekezo. Komatu kwa anthu ena, chisoni chimene chimakhalapo chisanafike chakufa kwambiri. Kuphunzira kwa amayi a ku Sweden omwe adamwalira amapeza kuti 40 peresenti ya amayiwa adapeza kuti chiwonongeko choyambirira chisanakhale chosautsa kusiyana ndi malo otayika.
Kodi Zimathandiza Chisoni Pambuyo pake?
Chisoni pamaso pa imfa sichimalowetsa chisoni pambuyo pake, ndipo sichifupikitsa mwachidule ndondomeko yakulira imfa ikadzachitika. Palibenso kuchuluka kwa chisoni chimene munthu amakumana nacho ndi imfa ya wokondedwa. Ndipo ngakhale ngati thanzi la wokondedwa wanu lakhala likuchepa kwa nthawi yayitali, palibe chomwe chingakonzekerereni imfa.
Komabe, ngakhale kuyembekezera kukhumudwa sikumalowetsa mmalo kapena ngakhale kumayambira mutu kwa chisoni pambuyo pake, kumvetsa chisoni pamaso pa imfa kumapereka mpata wokwanira kuti anthu omwe ataya okondedwa mwadzidzidzi asakhale nawo.
Cholinga
Kwa iwo amene akufa, chisoni choyembekezerapo chimapereka mpata wokukula paumwini kumapeto kwa moyo, njira yopezera tanthauzo ndi kutseka. Kwa mabanja, nthawiyi ndi mwayi wokhala wotsekedwa, kugwirizanitsa kusiyana, ndikupereka ndikupereka chikhululuko. Kwa onse, ndi mwayi wotsutsa. Usiku agogo anga anamwalira ine ndinali kugona naye. Anatembenukira kwa ine nanena, "ife tiphonye wina ndi mnzake," ndipo anandikumbatira. Icho chinali mphatso yake yabwino.
Timalandira maimelo nthawi zambiri popempha momwe timamvera za munthu wina m'banja yemwe amachezera wokondedwa wake wakufa. Ndemanga zomwe timamva ndizo, "Ndikufuna kukumbukira wokondedwa wanga momwe analili asanakhale ndi khansa," kapena "Sindikuganiza kuti ndingathe kupirira chisoni chochezera." Koma chisoni choyembekezereka mu malo awa chingakhale kuchiritsa.
Kafukufuku wina anapeza kuti chisoni chachikulu cha amayi omwe amuna awo anafa ndi khansa chinawathandiza kupeza tanthauzo la vuto lawo asanamwalire.
Ngakhale chilakolako choyembekezerapo sichimathandiza kuti chisonicho chikhale chosavuta, nthawi zina chimapangitsa kuti imfa ikhale yachilengedwe. N'zovuta kulola okondedwa athu kupita. Kuwawona iwo pamene ali ofooka ndi kulephera ndi kutopa kumachititsa mwina pang'ono chabe kuphweka kunena, "ndibwino kuti mupite patsogolo."
Zizindikiro
Zomwe zimaphatikizapo chisoni chodziwika ndizofanana ndi zomwe zimachitika pambuyo pa kutayika koma nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta kwambiri. Masiku ena akhoza kukhala ovuta kwambiri. Masiku ena simungamve chisoni konse. Zilembedwa ndi zina mwa zochitika zomwe zimagwirizanitsidwa ndi chisoni choyembekezereka. Izi zikuti, kumbukirani kuti aliyense amadandaula mosiyana.
- Chisoni ndi misozi: Chisoni ndi misonzi zimakula mofulumira komanso kawirikawiri pamene simukuyembekezera. Ngakhale zinthu zazing'ono, monga malonda a televizioni zingakhale kukumbukira mwadzidzidzi ndi zopweteka wokondedwa wanu akufa; pafupifupi ngati kuti ndi nthawi yoyamba pomwe mukudziŵa kuti mutayika.
- Mantha: Kukhala ndi mantha ndiwowonjezereka ndipo sikungowonjezera kuopa imfa kokha koma mantha ndi kusintha konse komwe kudzakhudzana ndi kutayika wokondedwa wanu.
- Kukhumudwa ndi mkwiyo: Inu mukhoza kukwiya, komabe zingakhalenso zovuta kuthana ndi mkwiyo wa wokondedwa wanu.
- Kusungulumwa: Nthaŵi zambiri kusungulumwa kwakukulu kumachitika ndi omwe akusamalira banja la munthu amene akufa ndi khansa. Mosiyana ndi chisoni pambuyo pa kutayika, kudzimva kuti sikuli kovomerezeka pakati pa anthu kuti afotokoze chisoni choyembekezereka kungapangitse kumverera kwa kudzipatula.
- Chikhumbo choyankhula: Kusungulumwa kungayambitse chikhumbo chofuna kulankhula ndi wina-aliyense-yemwe angamvetse momwe mumamvera ndi kumvetsera popanda chiweruzo. Ngati mulibe malo abwino oti muwonetsere chisoni chanu, izi zimatha kuchitapo kanthu kuti mutha kuchepa kapena kutaya mtima kuti muteteze ululu mumtima mwanu.
- Nkhawa: Pamene mukusamalira wokondedwa amene akufa, zimakhala ngati mukukhala ndi nkhawa nthawi zonse. Nkhaŵa, inanso, ingayambitse zizindikiro zakuthupi monga kunjenjemera, kugwedezeka, ndi kugwedezeka.
- Kulakwitsa: Kwa anthu ena, nthawi yisanafike imfa ya wokondedwa ikhoza kukhala nthawi yowopsya kwambiri-makamaka ngati wokondedwa wanu akuvutika. Panthawi imodzimodzi yomwe mukufuna kuti wokondedwa wanu asamve ululu (kotero, afe), mukuopa nthawi imene imfa idzachitike. Mwinanso mutha kukhala wopulumutsidwa mlandu , mlandu umene mudzatha kupitiliza ndi moyo wanu pamene wina sangafune.
- Kuganizira kwambiri za munthu amene amamwalira: Mwina mumadzidera nkhawa kwambiri ndi wokondedwa wanu, ndipo nkhawayi ingakhudze maganizo, zakuthupi, kapena zauzimu.
- Kufotokozera za imfa: Mwinamwake mungadziwone momwe zidzakhalire kuti wokondedwa wanu apite. Kapena ngati mukufa, mukuyang'ana momwe okondedwa anu adzapitirire mukamwalira. Anthu ambiri amadziimba mlandu chifukwa cha malingalirowa, koma ndi achilendo ndipo ali mbali yovomereza kuti sangathe kuphedwa.
- Matenda a thupi: Matenda monga matenda ogona komanso mavuto. Phunzirani zambiri za vuto lachisoni.
- Kuopa kuwonongeka, chifundo, ndi kusamalira ana: Kufufuza koyamba kunapeza kuti mantha omwe angadzachitike ndi momwe angasamalire anali amphamvu kwambiri kwa ana omwe akukumana ndi imfa ya kholo kapena agogo awo.
Ngakhale kuti mwamvapo za magawo achisoni ndi ntchito zinayi zachisoni , ndizofunikira kuzindikira kuti anthu ambiri samatsatira mwachangu masitepewa mmodzi ndi mmodzi ndikupeza kuti akuwuka mmawa wina akumva kuti avomereza zomwe zachitika ndipo anachira. M'malo mwake, zigawo izi zingakhalepo panthawi iliyonse ndipo mukhoza kupeza kuti mukukumana ndi mantha, kufunsa mafunso, kapena kukhumudwa nthawi zambiri. Monga taonera pamwambapa, palibe njira yolondola yolira kapena kumva chisoni.
Kuchiza ndi Uphungu
Chisoni choyembekezereka ndi njira yachizolowezi kupitirizabe kwachisoni. Koma nthawi zina, chisonichi chingakhale cholimba kwambiri moti chimadodometsa kuti mumatha kupirira. Zimakhalanso zachilendo kuti anthu ayambe kuvutika maganizo pamene akukumana ndi zovuta zonse zomwe zimakhala zowawa ndipo zingakhale zovuta kusiyanitsa chisoni chochokera ku maganizo.
Funsani thandizo kwa katswiri wa zamaganizo ngati mukukumana ndi mavuto. Muyenera kudziwa ngati simukudziwa ngati mukukumana ndi chisoni "chachibadwa" kapena kuti "chisoni " chovuta.
Kulimbana
Ndikofunika kufotokoza ululu wanu ndikudzipweteka. Kupeza bwenzi kapena wokondedwa wanu mukhoza kufotokozera zakukhosi kwanu momveka bwino, kumathandiza kwambiri, monga kukhalabe ndi chiyembekezo ndi kukonzekera imfa nthawi imodzi ndi kovuta. Zingakhale zovuta kwambiri pamene anthu angadabwe chifukwa chake mukulira-ngakhale kukwiyira kuti mukulira-asanafike imfa. Kumbukirani kuti kulekerera sikukutanthauza kuti muyenera kusiya kukonda wokondedwa wanu ngakhale atamwalira. Panthawi imeneyi, anthu ena amayamba kupeza malo otetezeka m'mitima yawo kuti azikumbukira wokondedwa wawo yemwe sadzafa.
> Zotsatira:
> Cheng, J. et al. Kufufuzidwa kwachisoni chakuyembekezera kwa odwala matenda a khansa. Psychooncology . 2010. 19 (7): 693-700.
> Coelho, A., ndi A. Barbosa. Chisoni Choyembekezera Banja. American Journal of Hospice ndi Care Palliative . 2016 Jan 1. (Epub patsogolo pa kusindikiza).
> Gross, J. et al. Chisoni cha achinyamata ndi achinyamata omwe akulimbana ndi khansa ya makolo. Praxis Kinderpsychologie ndi Kinderpsyychiatrie . 2012. 61 (6): 414-31.
> Hottensen, D. Chisoni choyembekezera kwa odwala ali ndi khansa. Clinical Journal ya Oncology Nursing . 2010. 14 (1): 106-7.
> Johansson A., ndi A. Grimby. Chisoni chodabwitsa pakati pa achibale apamtima a odwala kuchipatala cholandirira komanso kuchilonda. American Journal of Hospital ndi Care Palliative . 2012. 29 (2): 134-8.