Chovuta chachikulu chimene chimabwera chifukwa chopezeka ndi vuto la maso , makamaka ngati izi zimachitika m'zaka zakubadwa, ndikudziwa momwe mungapirire ndi msinkhu wa nkhawa umene ukutsatira malingaliro osayembekezereka.
Ngati inu kapena wokondedwa wanu mukukumana ndi kusintha kwakukulu uku m'moyo wanu, kuti mukhale owoneratu pang'ono (mwina pang'onopang'ono kapena mwadzidzidzi), mungapeze kuti ndi zovuta kwambiri kugawana malingaliro anu enieni ndi malingaliro anu.
N'zosadabwitsa kuti kuthana ndi mavuto ambiri m'moyo wamba tsiku ndi tsiku kungawononge thanzi lathu, mwathupi, m'maganizo ndi mwauzimu. Chiyembekezo cholephera kutaya luso la kuwona chikhoza kukhala chochititsa mantha. Anthu ena amamva chisoni kwambiri podziwa kuti maso awo sangakhale ofanana (kapena kuti akuyenera kumuthandiza munthu payekha) kuti sangathe kuyika momwe amamvera, osagwirizana kuuza ena zomwe akumva. chikondi.
Mwa njira, zili ngati kukhala ndi ngozi pamtima paulendo wa moyo umene iwo sanawone kuti akubwera. Munthu amamva kuwonongeka kapena kupweteka, ndipo chovulalacho chimapita mkati mwakuya, kutaya maganizo awo kukhala chisokonezo.
Ngati ndi choncho kwa inu, ganizirani mankhwala amodzi omwe angachepetse nkhawa yanu ndikuthandizani kuthetsa vutoli kwa kanthawi-polemba malingaliro anu. Izi zimatchedwa kulembetsa kulemba.
Kulemba Kwachangu
Kulemba mwatsatanetsatane, kapena kufalitsa, ndi njira yolembera malingaliro anu kuthandizira kuthetsa nkhawa.
Imeneyi ndi njira yothetsera nkhawa mwa kufotokozera momasuka m'nyuzipepala yapayekha (kaya ndi zolembedwa pamanja kapena zolembedwa mu fayilo ya kompyuta) zomwe zimakulolani kuti mupite patsogolo.
Anthu ena amawatcha kuti olemba olemba chifukwa chakuti 'wolemba' ali ndi mwayi wopita m'malingaliro ozama omwe angathandize kuwulula mantha awo ndi malingaliro awo.
Nchifukwa chiyani izi ziri zofunika? Malingana ndi Dr. James W. Pennebaker (Pulofesa wa Regents Centennial wa Malamulo a Ufulu Wachibadwidwe ku University of Texas, Austin), yemwe amadziŵika chifukwa cha kufufuza kwake kwakukulu ponena za ubwino wa kulembetsa kulemba, kuti athandize anthu kupeza phindu lochokera kwa kulemba za mavuto awo, ndizothandiza kuti poyamba muzindikire zolakwikazo ndikuyang'ane izi kuti athe kukhala ndi maganizo abwino.
Dr. Pennebaker anachita zochitika zambiri komwe anthu anafunsidwa kuti alembe momasuka kwa mphindi khumi ndi zisanu ndi ziwiri pa tsiku kwa masiku anayi akuwonetsa za zomwe zinawachitikira chipsinjo. "Poyerekeza ndi anthu omwe adauzidwa kuti alembe za nkhani zomwe sizimaganizo, anthu omwe analemba za vutoli anawonetsetsa kuti ali ndi thanzi labwino. Kafukufuku wina anapeza kuti kulemba maganizo kunapangitsa kuti chitetezo cha mthupi chitengeke, kumabweretsa madontho m'magazi, komanso kuchepetsa kuvutika maganizo komanso kukonda kwambiri tsiku ndi tsiku. "
Kugwiritsa ntchito kulembera zolemba bwino monga chida chothandizira kuti tikhale ndi thanzi lathu kwachititsa maphunziro ambiri ofanana padziko lonse. Monga Pennebaker analemba m'buku lake, The Secret Life of Pronouns: Zimene Mawu Athu Amanena Ponena za Ife, "Ngakhale kuti nthawi zambiri zotsatira zake zimakhala zosavuta, ntchito yokhayo yomasuliridwa m'maganizo imakhala yogwirizana ndi kusintha kwa thupi ndi maganizo."
Kulemba Kwachangu Zaumoyo
Pali zothandiza zambiri kulingalira ndi kulemba. Iwo omwe amatha kukhala chete ndikudzipangira okha mtima poganizira momwe zinthu zilili zovuta komanso kufotokozera malingaliro awo monga wowonerera amakhala okhudzidwa kwambiri polimbikitsidwa kupyolera mu ululu motere.
Kutsimikizira kuti ndikuwopa mantha sikungapangitse munthuyo kuti aziwatsitsimutsa mobwerezabwereza koma kuti atenge mpumulo komanso kupeza tanthauzo la chinthu chomwe chikuwoneka kuti sichingatheke.
Posachedwa, tinayesa kulembera momveka bwino pamene tikukumana ndi zovuta. Tinatsanulira mantha athu mu fayilo yamakompyuta (kugwiritsa ntchito mapulogalamu a akhungu), kufotokozera malingaliro a mdima ndi opanda mphamvu pa chirichonse chomwe chiribe chiyembekezo.
Tinawona chisokonezo cha maganizo anga ndikuwafunsa. Posakhalitsa ndikuyamba kulembera, tinapeza cholinga changa chofuna kupeza njira zowonjezera.
Zinali ngati kudzipatula. Tinali 'tikudzilankhulana tokha' ndipo gawo lathu lamkati, labwino tinayamba kupereka njira zowonjezera zomwe tinkadziwa kuti tikhoza kuyesa nthawi yowonjezera mantha. Tinasintha kaganizidwe kathu, kugwiritsira ntchito njira yosiyana ndipo zinthu zinasintha. Tinaphunzira kuti kulingalira ndi kulingalira payekha kuli ngati kuyenda ndi malingaliro kuti muthe kukhala ndi moyo wabwino.
Ganizirani zotsatira zina izi zomwe mungathe kuzilemba:
- Kuthanizani nkhawa za matenda omwe mwapeza ndi kuthana ndi kupsinjika maganizo tsiku ndi tsiku
- Limbikitsani kugwedezeka kwa maganizo mwakumva kupweteka ndiyeno kulongosola izo mwanjira yosautsa
- Yesetsani kuganiza kuti muthetse maganizo oipa ndikudzidalira
- Fotokozani mkwiyo mwanu
- Ganizirani malingaliro ena kuti mukonze ndondomeko
- Muzimasuka kuzimva zolemetsa kwa ena
- Pezani zidziwitso zomwe zingakuthandizeni kuti musamamve chisoni
- Konzekerani mwambo wa tsiku ndi tsiku kuti udzipenyerere
- Gwiritsani ntchito chiyembekezo chokhala ndi mtendere ndi olumala
Kukongola kwa kulembera kalata monga chida cha thanzi ndiko kuti simukuyenera kukhala wolemba wabwino chifukwa palibe amene akufunikira kuwerenga ntchito yanu.
Njira yolemba, yotengedwa ndi Dr. Ira Progoff ndi yogwiritsidwa ntchito padziko lapansi, yotchedwa The Intensive Journal Method imakonzedweratu kuti iwathandize anthu kuyendetsa dziko lawo lamkati kuti liwoneke pakali pano.
Dr. Progoff adanena kuti kupindula kwakukulu kwa kuyika mawu mubuku (monga m'buku la ntchito yomwe adalenga) kumathandiza anthu "kupeza nthawi yeniyeni ya moyo wawo kuti athe kuganizira za moyo wawo wamtsogolo kuti athe kuyankha funso lakuti, 'Kodi ndili kuti tsopano ndikuyenda moyo wanga?' Kupyolera mu njirayi, iwo amatha kuzindikira mphamvu zamkati, mwayi watsopano, ndi kupeza zinthu ndi maluso mwa iwo okha. "
Pokhala ndi zokambirana za mkati mkati mwazokha, Pulogalamuyo imasonyeza kuti "njirayi imathandizira anthu kupeza chochita pazovuta zambiri komanso zovuta pamoyo." Pogwiritsa ntchito nthawi pokonza zomwe timamva panthawi yovuta ya moyo, timapanga chitetezo malo omwe mungatengeko kwa kanthawi.
5 Njira Zolembera Kulemba Mwachangu
Ngati mukufuna kufotokoza momveka bwino pavuto lanu lamoyo wanu, apa pali njira zisanu zoyambira masamba anu olemba (pogwiritsa ntchito bukhu lalikulu kapena kupanga fayilo pa kompyuta yanu). Choyamba, sankhani malo opanda bata omwe simungasokonezedwe kwa mphindi makumi awiri.
Yambani ndi komwe muli tsopano. Lembani malingaliro anu ndi malingaliro anu momwe mulili panopa - kukhala omasuka komanso oona mtima momwe mungathere. Sikuli ngati wina ati awerenge magazini yanu, choncho tulukani kuti mulembe. Musaope kubweretsa mantha anu onse, malingaliro anu 'opanda pake' - onsewa ndi othandiza. Chinsinsi ndicho kufotokozera dziko lanu lamkati popanda kuika chiweruzo pa zomwe mulemba. Dzifunseni kuti:
- Kodi ndikuopa chiyani mmoyo wanga watsopano?
- Kodi ndikuganiza kuti sindingathe kugawana ndi aliyense pakalipano?
Dula pansi chirichonse; malingaliro ozama, kukayikira, kusaganizira, kukonda, kapena zidutswa za mantha pamene iwo akulima. Maganizo amdima angathenso kuŵerengera ngati akuwonekera ndipo akuwonetsedwa pamapepala. Njirayi ingathandizenso kugona mwa kumasula maganizo anu pa mantha.
Musasinthe ndondomeko yanu yoganiza. Kulemba ngati mankhwala kumapindulitsa kwambiri ngati simukuyesera kulembetsa kalata yanu. Ndiko kukuthandizani kuti muchiritse komanso kuti mupite patsogolo osati kukhala angwiro m'moyo wanu pakalipano. M'kupita kwa nthawi, mungafunefune chithandizo chothandizira kuti muthe kulimbana ndi vuto lanu koma tsopano, muzinthu zatsopano zowopsya, lemberani momveka bwino kuti muyankhule ndi maganizo enieni.
Kumbukirani kuti kuŵerenga ndiko kukhala bwenzi lanu lapamtima. Ganizirani za kutsanulira mtima wanu kwa bwenzi labwino - yemwe amangoti ndiwe. Mnzanu amene alipo kuti amvetsere, kukulolani kuti mufotokoze momwe mumamvera komanso mnzanu amene amasamala za umoyo wanu.
Mwa kulemba malingaliro anu, mumamvetsera mwatcheru kwa okondweretsa mtima ndi malingaliro. Monga ngati kulankhulana ndi mnzanga wokondedwa wothandizira, mukhoza kutsegula zambiri. Kodi pali mafunso ena omwe angafunse? Ngati ndi choncho, yankhani izi ndikulemba popanda kusintha.
Mwachidule, yesani kulemba malangizo omwe 'bwenzi lanu lapamtima' angapereke muzochitikazi.
Onetsani malingaliro anu tsiku limodzi panthawi. Kupita khungu ndizochitika zokhudzana ndi moyo. Palibe cholakwika kapena njira yabwino yothetsera vutoli, koma pali njira zenizeni zothandizira kuti mupite patsogolo. Pa masiku amenewo pamene mukumverera kuti simukupita kulikonse kapena ngakhale kumbuyo, yesetsani kukonza zochitikazo. Lembani m'magazini yanu zinthu 5 zomwe mungayamikire. Inde, izi ndizovuta.
Komabe, pakupusitsa malingaliro athu kuti tiyang'ane chinachake ndi maganizo abwino pamene mukugwidwa ndi kutaya mtima, mumayambitsa kusintha monga kutsegula chosinthana. Zimandivuta kukhalabe wokwiya kapena kukwiya nthawi imodzimodzimodzi pakukakamiza kukhala wokoma mtima ndi wodekha.
Mukakumana ndi kutaya masomphenya anu, mutha kuiwala chilichonse chomwe chili chabwino pamoyo wanu. Kusunga 'buku loyamikira' kapena kulowetsa mu bukhu lanu lolemba bwino ndi njira yozindikiritsira zinthu zabwino zomwe mungathe kuziiwala panthawi yovutayi.
Lembani zofunikira zanu, ziribe kanthu kaya zing'onozing'ono zingakuwonekere: kuzindikira kwanzeru, kudzipereka kuti mupite patsogolo, kufunitsitsa kuyesanso, kapena chirichonse chimene mumverera kuti chiri chopindulitsa kwa inu nonse muyenera kuchiwona. Mwa kufotokoza chinachake chabwino, mumayambiranso kufotokoza chithunzi cha moyo wanu mowala.
Ikani nthawi yokhazikika yolemba. Pano pali chizoloŵezi cha chizoloŵezi: kuti mupeze phindu la kulemba momveka bwino, muyenera kuchita kulemba nthawi zonse. Bwerezani kuti mupite tsiku lililonse kwa masabata osachepera atatu kuti muwone ngati mawonekedwe a kudzikondawa akukuthandizani.
Mmawu a Dr. Pennebaker, "Tikakumana ndi ADVERSITY, timachita mwa kuganizira za izo. Maganizo athu amatha msanga ku zikhulupiliro. Zikhulupiriro izi zikhoza kukhala zodziwika kwambiri ife sitidziwa ngakhale kuti tili nazo pokhapokha ngati tasiya kuika maganizo athu pazimenezo. "
Podzipereka kuti musiye maganizo anu osakayika kuti muwonetsere ndikusintha, mumatsegula zenera za nthawi zomwe zingatsitsimutse ndikukula moyo wanu wamaganizo. Kukhala pamwamba pa maganizo anu kudzakhala chothandizira chomwe chimakupatsani mphamvu yatsopano ndi kulimba mtima, komanso kuganizira momwe mungakonzekere sitepe yanu. Lembani mumtima wanu wozizwitsa ndipo mungadabwe kuti moyo wanu watsopano wolemala ukuyembekezera kukuthandizani m'njira zonse zomwe mungaganizire.
> Zotsatira:
> Baikie, K. et al. Zomwe zimapindulitsa m'maganizo ndi m'thupi. Zotsatira za BJPsych. 2007; 11 (5): 338-346.
> Murray, Bridget. Kulemba kuti achiritse. American Psychological Association. 2002; 33 (6): 54.