Agulu, mwa mawonekedwe ake ophweka, ndi luso lochita mwanjira yomwe ikukwaniritsira zolinga zanu. Kukhala ndi bungwe mu gawo la moyo wanu ndiko kukhala ndi mphamvu yakuchita mwanjira yomwe ingabweretse zotsatira zomwe mukufuna.
Pokambirana za bungwe pankhani ya umoyo wogonana, chomwe chikufotokozedwa ndi gulu lovuta, luso, ndi luso. Bungwe lachiwerewere limaphatikizapo:
- Kukwanitsa kudzifotokozera nokha - kugonana kumatanthawuza kugonana - kugonana ndi kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha, pambali pa masewera omwe amachokera ku chikhalidwe chogonana ndikufuna kugonana, kapena onse awiri.
- Kukwanitsa kusankha ngati mukufuna kuchita zogonana - onse komanso ndi munthu wina pa nthawi inayake mwanjira inayake.
- Kukhoza kusankha momwe mukufuna kuchita zogonana - kuphatikizapo ngati mukufuna kugonana mosamala
- Kukwanitsa kusiya kuchita chiwerewere chomwe sichifunikanso kapena kukana zochita zomwe sizinafuneke
Mwa kuyankhula kwina, ngati muli ndi bungwe la kugonana, mukudziwa zomwe mukufuna kugonana ndi zomwe simukuzifuna. Inu mumatha kupanga ndi kukakamiza zosankha za moyo wanu wa kugonana. Mungathe kunena "inde" kapena "ayi" ndi kumveketsa mawu anu ndi mnzanuyo. Simuli m "malo omwe zoopseza, kuzunzidwa, kudandaula za kupulumuka kapena mavuto ena zimachotsa luso lanu lochita zosankha zaulere zokhudzana ndi kugonana kapena ayi.
Kugonana kwanu kumatanthauzidwa ndi zosankha zomwe mumadzipanga nokha, osati maganizo a ena. Inu simungakhoze kuvomereza kokha, mukhoza kuchita motero.
Nthambi sizomwe zimakhala zofanana ndi kudzikonda , ngakhale kuti pali kuwonjezeka kwakukulu. Mwachindunji, kukhala wodzidalira pazinthu zina za kukambirana za kugonana kungathandizire kwambiri kuganiza za kugonana, koma pali zochitika zomwe kudzikonda nokha sikumapereka bungwe.
Pali zifukwa zambiri zomwe zimachititsa kuti anthu asagwirizane ndi kugonana. Izi zikuphatikizapo:
- Kulephera kusagwirizana ndi zikhalidwe zokhudzana ndi chikhalidwe cha momwe wina yemwe amawakondera amayenera kuchita chiwerewere. Mwachitsanzo, malingaliro akuti amayi sayenera kukhala okondweretsedwa ndi kugonana angachititse kuti zikhale zovuta kwa mkazi yemwe ali ndi chidwi chogonana kuti afotokoze chidwi chake mwa njira yabwino.
- Mikangano yapakati pa zilakolako za kugonana - mwina chifukwa cha zilakolako za kugonana kapena kugonana - zomwe zimanyansidwa ndi anthu ambiri.
- Amasowa mphamvu kapena bungwe kuti athe kupanga zisankho muzochita zachiwerewere ndi chikhalidwe.
Ngakhale kuti zokambirana zambiri zokhudzana ndi kugonana zimakhudza ngati Amerika amatsutsana ndi amuna monga chiwawa ndi akazi ngati alonda a chiwerewere amakana akazi awo ogonana, palibe zochepa za momwe ziwonetserozi zingathe kuchotseratu kugonana kwa amuna. Mfundo yakuti amuna amayembekezera nthawi zonse kugonana komanso nthawi zonse kukhala ndi chidwi pa kugonana kungachititse kuti zikhale zovuta kwa iwo kunena "ayi" kwa kugonana komwe samafuna monga momwe nthawi zambiri amai amachitira "inde" kwa kugonana zomwe akufuna.